The shadow side
Why I struggled with it is that I have been trained to not go back, to look at what was there in the past. I did not see it as necessary to recreate the pain that was, however, in this method it’s kind of useful to see the blind spots. The voids in yourself and life.
I was greatly surprised how many there were… I am pretty aware in most areas of my life, but obviously there are places where I am in avoidance.
It wasn’t an easy ride by any means.
Part of the practice is to go and see what is, and I discovered I was sitting in a lie there every time; it makes me laugh as I just can’t believe it. I am doing it; however, I did it.
Also, I am not a fan of the terminology used there; one of many is the word Structure; I run to the winds when I hear that, although I love a certain level of routine very much in my life I know now it’s the repression of creation.
The structure in my life has created nothing. The education the workplaces associated with this word remind me only of angst.
I have created magic from the chaos, and it has worked better than any structure, but the truth is it hasn’t had a direction or much of awareness attached. Chaos in this context usually means not knowing ‘the how’ or ‘when’ or ‘who’; you have to find your own because the existing/surrounding doesn’t seem to be desirable.
That is what this modality offers, and once again I saw how well it worked for people who haven’t done that much spiritual work beforehand.
The fact that I do not want to see the s… I knew immediately that it was true because I have always had a few more red blood cells than the white ones. It’s not a medical condition, but it’s been there since my 20s. What it means is exactly that; I am ignoring the shadow sides of life. I do not want to see the bad. The good and bad points of view are not perfectly balanced in me. And Healy has been telling me the exact same thing since the day we met. ☺️
To add to that, obviously the discord (not willing to see the shadow sides) is minor, as if we aren’t willing to see certain things in life, we lose eyesight; so far I have all good with that. If you can’t see far, i.e., have myopia, you’re ignoring or are afraid of the future that you do not want to see. Presbyopia: not willing to see what’s going on right now or having avoidance with the present; you can’t see close.
White blood cells also present the male energy and red ones female energy; what it tells me is that there’s not enough man in me. We have both energies in us.
Yes, well, if I know nothing else :), I know I chose the gender, the body I want to be in; one mess less to sort out in this lifetime.
Energetically, women are the vision of a dream, and men are the ones materialising it. So, men, by choosing their woman, they’re choosing their life because she is the vision. Oh, I am so much about vision, obviously, too much. 🙂 And I have a few for everyone, lol.
Some of you we have met in this lifetime; you know it’s true. We made s…/things happen! 🙂
Some examples of the egoic mind that you wouldn’t think of. You say:
I didn’t see
I didn’t hear
I didn’t know.
I need more time – more time = more pain (E.Tolle)
I tried — there’s no such thing. You do it or not.
I didn’t notice.
I do not believe it’s possible, etc.
These are the ways to avoid, ignore and not take action – not to act on your truth, not owning it.
I noticed that every time I asked her a question, I knew immediately after asking it what the answer was going to be.
She said, Next time you want to ask a question, ask yourself first: is it coming from my egoic mind?
Ego wants to know, asks questions, and needs proof. Your true self knows. Always.
Isn’t it interesting?
I have always ignored using the word ‘ego’ as it has too many negative connotations attached to it, but the truth is it is an important part of us to be aware of, as it’s part of creation and self-realisation.
As we imagine it, so it is.✨✨✨Yeees!☺️