Are You Living Your Truth or Someone Else’s? Let Go of Shame, Stop Hiding & Reclaim Your Power

Photo: Above the clouds. Got a bit of cold as a result—but worth it.:)

Did you think? About the questions from the last post?

I do not remember if there was a question to ask of yourself: Is it working for me? You could ask that one with everyone or everything in your life.

I’d say in terms of  relationships I usually listen to people who actually have that, but again I always am interested in different perspectives. Most people have their own perspective, and I am interested; it doesn’t mean I have to live that (it goes for you as well). I thought many of you would like that (listening in the prev post), which is why I put it out here; it might help you free yourself from self-judgement. Your choice is yours; it’s better to be in peace with it.

However, my perspective towards a body is that it is sacred on it’s own way; I do not think it should be shared just for fun randomly with  – anyone, and I do not know where that is from; I have always had that. Perhaps it is ‘thinking’ (not exactly that, perhaps feeling or perceiving) long-term: we have to live in that body for a long time.  Ask yourself: how will I feel about this in five years? I do not mind people choosing something else, but my perspective is simply different, and let’s be honest, I do not even know if I know anyone who thinks the same way. Your perspective doesn’t have to be popular, just true for you. Maybe here was someone after all who had to hear it.

Back to the questions: Do you want to be seen, but keep hiding?

What if you stopped hiding? What would that be like? What would that create?

Ask: Wow, whose points of view am I living? Ask in every area of your life.

And then there are people who aren’t willing to be seen at any cost (it’s most times based on childhood trauma, so much hidden beauty! Is it you?); if you’re the aware one, then you can see some of that but also know that there’s a lot that you can’t see. You are willing to be the space where they might or might not start to bloom one day by saying that you can’t expect anything, and if it does happen, it’s the most beautiful thing, a celebration. I have witnessed it, but that one took a very long time and was unexpected when it happened. What took a long time was them to choose it, not the choice.

Have you noticed that very often people who can see you do not actually ‘know’ you very well? Sometimes they are complete strangers; it’s because they do not have a box or context. They perceive you Now at this moment. Who or what are you at this moment? Did you smile? 🙂 You’re not your history. You are Now.

And eventually. What if you didn’t need to be seen? At all? That’s freedom. Being seen but not needing it. And actually, you do not need it, not in a sense we’re thinking of it.

Going back to the health conditions.

There is always more into it than one post about anything; use these as pointers. Saying all that, every illness hides behind itself an ‘ugly’ or shameful root cause, but is it really, or is it just a limited point of view? Shame is the other end of pride; shame is a made-up construct. Shame is a learned response, not an inherent truth. Feel the difference when you’re saying: ‘I am happy for you, vs I am proud of you.’ Could write another page about it. One is smth you have to earn, isn’t it? We’re humans learning to live. Some learn by doing drugs and then trying to quit, some are alcoholics, some are the greatest manipulators, and some are creating fatal illnesses for themselves. Not one is better or worse than the other. If you’re aware, you can see that and awareness helps to change that for yourself. Ask, ‘What is it really?’

There was a brilliant talk (not all agreeable points but truths in it) in socials about how bad behaviour is masked very often these days with psychological terms, because you’re so willing and so kind and you keep tolerating it; you think that you are wrong. If that’s you, have a listen. The same masked, toxic positivity breaks up beautiful communities.

While we’re here, we ‘understand’ and empathise  – there is another side of it.

‘We’ve turned emotional harm into a psychology lesson.’ Hamza Zaid

This chat critically examines the modern tendency to use psychological frameworks to explain and excuse harmful behaviour in others. It argues that while understanding context and trauma can be important, over-intellectualising negative actions often leads to tolerating mistreatment that should not be accepted. The author calls for prioritising personal boundaries and self-respect over endless empathy and analysis.

Most importantly: What is possible beyond all that?

There definitely is a lot more possible. 🙂

Thank you for you, and have too much fun at Easter!

Music: Songs are coming all by themselves through mostly social media to me recently. Very mellow ones; it feels like they chose me, it’s getting weird so I skip a song today.

Is anyone going to see Ngaiire’s Blastoma 10-year anniversary tour? It’s not happening in Brisbane; it physically hurts to miss that out..what else is possible? 🙂