Photo: The new park to walk in; many dog kisses are promised daily. 🙂

I am going to write one sentence about everything; is that alright? You kind of think of the rest as per usual. 🙂 One day if there’s no internet anymore, that’s the way we’re going to communicate anyway. So better practice now.

The Truth About Anger, Self-Respect and Becoming

I realised that some kind of ball got rolling last November. Imagine someone you’ve been patient; their message is ‘I do what I want.’ You’re going to forgive me anyway.’ 🎶🎶

It made me so angry even more than any lie could no matter the context or who it would’ve been directed to! It makes me laugh now; I actually can’t believe how upset I got, and it’s not easy to make me angry, but since it was a ‘repeat offender’, it kind of makes sense. I can’t even remember the time before that; I was so angry. Anyway, that led to many insightful chapters, which were hopefully useful.

It also made me very sick; I was in bed for 7 days with a so-called cold, perhaps that emotion was looking for the way out. I never have a temperature, but I had this time, temperature – burning anger.

So, what was I angry about? 1. About myself (I had called it ‘patience’ when it was something else) 2. About them (disrespect, entitlement).

It happened because I had been unkind to me and they made it obvious to me by being that to me. Yes, that’s how brutal the truth sometimes is.

So, what if you look at your life? Where have you been unkind to yourself  – before someone else will come to show that to you?

Is your patience being kind to yourself?

I have been listening since the beginning of the year to your future-self meditation that Ali and Amazing Rosie (Heart Brain Harmony) had recorded. I am not a fan of meditations, but the voices of these ladies take me far, so I’ve been pretty much listening to them daily. Interestingly, my future self has grey eyes; I definitely don’t have them atm, and I’m thinking of someone to whom they might actually belong.

Then, just a day before I got taken down by a cold, I went to the live circle of coherence in Kiheld’s Mountain. One exercise was to stare into the stranger’s eyes for 3 minutes, repeated with 4 different people. The first lady that was looking into my eyes said, ‘You have grey eyes.’ ‘Never in my life has anyone concluded that!?’ Anyway, it made me happy and stunned, as if she saw live the future version of me (Who for whatever reason has grey eyes in my meditation).

Staring into people’s eyes was generally a very cool experience; it made me happy. My heart got an instant connection with theirs. I felt like I went to fly with these people I did the exercise with; I perceived what was holding them back, what their greatness is, etc.

I didn’t say anything at the time, but I am telling you now: I wish you knew how beautiful you actually are underneath all that trauma & drama & structure & fear.

In between all that, I had a Global Access Foundation class; I was present on all days except one, when my head just didn’t allow any sounds in. I am endlessly grateful for their work in this world not because I feel I agree with everything but because they’re willing to go beyond what’s seemingly possible; they’re not waiting for the science to catch up/read validation.

If you were truly you, you would do/be the same; you wouldn’t wait for the validation, proof, allowance or recognition; you would just go. What if you start now? What would your life be like?

It’s the same thing: lose the middleman and see what rolls out.

I loved the quote from the first day Gary spoke about being weird: “If you’re poor and weird, you’re crazy, but if you’re rich and weird, you’re eccentric”—highlighting a double standard in how society judges unconventional behaviour depending on a person’s bank account. That’s when Gary decided to get rich. What would it take for you/me to choose that? 🙂 I hope to find some more nuggets on the topic once I re-listen the recordings.

Here are some of the very first quotes & questions from the first day, before I was out the next day.

What messed reality are you choosing to create the reality you’re choosing?

Just because you’re aware of something doesn’t mean it’s yours.

Stop caring about people who can’t receive your caring.

Are you caring or controlling?

Are you willing to be better than others but not as good as you?

Have you practised ‘All life comes to me with ease & joy & glory’ yet? I even made a little video for socials; you can mainly see my nose holes, but that’s up there. lol

More on the topic: All life comes to me with ease & joy glory

Food for thought: ‘Doubt only exists in distraction’. Bruce Lee

Stay well!

💚

Music: I have so much good music now that it’s very hard to choose what to put up here. I guess most of it is called dark R&B. Heh, here are 3 songs to choose from. Drama sounds so good in music; it’s insane, but I will choose mellow today.